How Could I?
by laureas
Summary: Three very simple words screamed from a man in agony, in a desperate last plea for understanding. Yet they were the words that would change the fate of a Galaxy. One-shot ROTS AU.


**"How could I?"**

Summary: Three very simple words screamed from a man in agony, in a desperate last plea for understanding. Yet they were the words that would change the fate of a Galaxy. One-shot ROTS AU.

Disclaimer - I neither own copyright nor receive money for anything. I write to improve my ability and for enjoyment.

It was a scene from anyone's worst nightmare. A fallen hero, broken and battered, about to be consumed by the fires of Hell itself. And above his heart-broken mentor, unable to understand even now why it had come to this. Obi-wan's half-screamed accusation proved this. "You were the Chosen One! You were suppose to destroy the Sith, not join them! To bring balance to the Force, not leave it in Darkness." The fallen one wanted to scream out his hate at the man above him. Instead he cried out what he thought would be his last plea of understanding to the one who never had.

"How could I?!" With that simple question time seemed to stop for the two men, once brothers and now mortal enemies. Obi-wan was utterly taken aback. What did Anakin mean by 'how could he'? Surely he understood his role in the Force by now, everything had been give to him to fore-fill his destiny.

It seemed the Force itself was intervening on behalf of it's Chosen at that moment. For now Obi-wan heard the unspoken words that would bring true understanding, words that Anakin himself could no longer say out loud. "How could I bring balance to the Force, when I could no longer find balance in myself? When the very things that gave me balance had been stripped from me, leaving me floundering in the dark? Till I could trust no one, not even you about that which would aid me?"

And with those unspoken words came impressions of a mind teetering on the verge of chaos. The longing for trust, approval that had never been given to him save grudgingly. The sense of betrayal that ran so deep that it was an open sore in the younger man's heart. The confusion and frustration was overlaying it all till he could no longer see the true path, for even the right thing had become wrong. The dreams of hope that had been crushed one by one, from the time he'd been brought before the Council until this last desperate hope to save the one he loved the most from destruction. For she had been the last one who had any understanding of his true heart. And now even she had done the unthinkable and so had he in retaliation.

Anakin Skywalker, "The hero with no Fear", "The Chosen One", was a man like any other man. Just as much flesh and blood as anyone else and capable of making mistakes. How could he not fail at his appointed task when none seemed to even know what it was? In seeking to please the whole Council, the whole Order, he had pleased none. And the sense of rejection that they had planted in him at such a critical time when he was fresh from his homeworld and the understanding of a mother's love had grown until it dominated his life. He was a failure at everything that he deemed important. And now that bitter sense of worthlessness was costing the man his soul.

Obi-wan finally understood and as he realized finally what his former padawan meant and the price the Jedi were paying as a whole for their blind arrogance, time resumed. Anakin's grasping hand slid slightly, just enough to bring the stump of his left leg into contact with the lava flow below him. As it ignited his clothes, his groans became terrifiying screams of pure torment. The fire raced up his back and he was seconds away from being burned to death. And then Obi-wan reached with the Force and crushed the fires out.

The battle had taken a savage physical and mental toll on the older Jedi. He no longer had the strength in the Force to both keep the fires that were about to consume his younger brother at bay and call him away from the fiery river bank. Only by concentrating on shielded him in the Force and physically going down after Anakin now, could he hope to save his brother from the immolation. And if he failed at that, well he deserved to suffer the same fate. The fire that had started to climb up Anakin's back was out, just below his shoulder-length hair. But the burns that he'd taken already were deep and even now his chest was burning from the scorching ash. His groans of physical anguish were heightened by the scorching torment his spirit had been in from the beginning.

When the younger man felt ash running in his face and was able to realize that some of the pain had lessened he managed to lift his head again. What he saw both astonished him and suddenly pushed back the darkness that was consuming him from within.

Through the hazy mist of sudden tears, he could see his master making his cautious way down the bank, sliding inch by agonizing inch towards the spot where he lay trapped. The look of sheer determination on Obi-wan's face was beyond anything Anakin ever had seen. Sparks landed in his hair and beard, yet Obi-wan didn't seemed to notice or care even when the sparks started to burn his face and body. Anakin couldn't believe it, that his master was actually coming to save him from his fiery doom. Yet finally both Obi-wan's strength and his concentration gave at once. It was one misstep but it sent Obi-wan plunging headfirst towards the lava. Even so, his eyes never left Anakin's in a silent plea for forgiveness. Only to find himself next to Anakin at the last possible instant as Anakin used his own strength to save his master from the death that had been so close to taking the younger man.

Obi-wan didn't even pause to catch his breath at the near-escape or wait to ensure that his own strength would return. Ever so carefully he grasped Anakin's body, pulling the younger man off of the searing ground and using his own body to shield Anakin from any more harm. Legs that had no strength to hold his own weight let alone the weight of both of them, stil scrabbled in the ash. To push them both further away from flaming destruction. Anakin could see the tears streaming down Obi-wan's face, even though his master had his eyes closed in the single-minded effort to get his brother to safety.

Finally Obi-wan paused as he sense that barring any sudden catastrophe they were out of immediate danger. And he was too exhausted to go any further up the bank at any rate. He would finish making the climb, even though it seemed impossible in his condition. Yet he no longer look at Anakin even as he pulled the younger man's head in towards his own chest. Obi-wan didn't want to see that he'd been too late, that he may have saved Anakin's physical remains, but his soul was already lost. It would only be fair afterwards to know that he'd finally understood only too late. Hadn't Anakin faced that feeling himself enough times? It would only be justice for his own crimes.

However, Anakin was having none of that. How many times had he begged, pleaded, cried for someone to understand besides Padme? And he knew that his master finally did, somehow. For if he hadn't, then he would have left Anakin to burn convinced that nothing would save his former padawan now. That 'Vader' was all that remained behind and it deserved to suffer a horrible death for taking his brother. Obi-wan had tucked Anakin's remaining arm around his waist, keeping it in place with his own left arm even as he used both to keep his grip on the younger man. Now Anakin forced the mechanics in his lower arm to work, moving the arm higher up to take hold of Obi-wan's shoulder.

Startled, Obi-wan looked down even though the fear of being too late was very obvious in his face. It was slowly being replaced by a tentative hope, as he looked closer. And Anakin wanted nothing more then to reasure him.  
He finally managed to open his mouth and get his raw voice working again. "Master," he croaked out. And was rewarded with one of one of Obi-wan's rare smiles even as fresh tears streaked down his master's face.

"Anakin,"Obi-wan answered back hoarsly. "I should have seen, tried to understand better. I have failed you as a master and as a brother."

"My choice in the end Master,"Anakin rasped and then started to cough. Despite the searing heat of the air he felt cold inside and out, the icy embrace of the Dark Side still calling. Part of him still longed to let go and dive into that power, fiery at first then frozen to chill any remains of guilt and pain. But the greater part of him felt the gentle warmth of the Light strengthened by knowledge and new understanding. A very physical pressence now, in the arms that until only a few mintues ago had wielded the saber against him. With that comfort came the responsiblity and the guilt he would ever face in aiding the horror unleashed on the Galaxy.

He wouldn't face it alone. Even if no one else would stand with him, Obi-wan would. The shoulder to lean on, the one who would offer understanding comfort when it became too much, it had become Padme's role as Anakin's wife. Only because he had to look away from the Temple, away from his peers and the one person who should have been that shoulder to begin with. "Your choice, Anakin? You felt you had none left, that all paths were closed to you and only by a gamble could you possibly win. It should have never come to that," Obi-wan told him as he cautiously gathered himself.

As Obi-wan stood up he could feel Anakin reach for the Force to aid his balance. And felt his heart lift even more. "We'll do this together, Anakin" Obi-wan told him, a repeat of what he had said on the 'Invisble Hand' only a short time ago, when it seemed everything was so clouded. Only this time Obi-wan meant his words in the fullest sense. Despite the chill in his heart and the dread he still felt, Anakin managed to let a sembalance of his dare-devil smirk cross his pained features. Though bloodshot, his eyes had never seemed so brillantly blue as he agreed, "Together, Master."

And together, the master carried the fallen apprentice back towards the ships that sat in wait for them, the unknown future that was no longer so dark. For standing together their light would be strengthen. And it would change everything. All because of three words that had swept away years of misunderstanding.

A true miracle of the Force.


End file.
